August Sunrises & Thoughts...
confessions, hindsight & black and white photography
I know, the black and white seems opposite of what a beach sunrise is…colorful. But, there are some images that are just better in black and white. Don’t you agree? My love for black and white photography runs deep…so deep that I almost considered bringing up to my husband 2 years ago,
“what do you think about having all our wedding images shot in B&W?!”
I changed my mind, because the colors of the season just begged for color, but I seriously thought about it for a hot minute! The images that are black and white? Those are the ones that are printed and hanging on our walls in our home. So…. yeah :)
I’ve been thinking about our wedding a lot the past few days. It’s coming up on two years this October and I’m going to say something controversial… I loved our day, but I don’t look back on it with adoration or 100% certainty that it was everything I hoped it would be.
The biggest regrets are two-fold. First, I wish it had been smaller and less intricate. Second, I wish I had found the money and budgeted for a full-time coordinator that took over all the set-up, breakdown and planning portion of the day. My family and friends helped me out that morning, but I’m acutely aware that some resented me for that and it has a chokehold on me to this day.
When I let my mind wander to that day and I think about the things that I would do over, this is what I re-imagine the day looking like:
Smaller and more inclusive venue. Fewer guests; we had 60 and I’d cut that number in half.
Non-white dress — something totally different. Maybe jewel tone, maybe a soft mauve or pink. Just not white. I look back on my pictures and I feel sooooo washed out. White isn’t a color I wear well, in my opinion. I also would have taken more time to choose my dress and gone with a style that was more forgiving up top ;)
I would have done my own makeup and worn my hair much differently.
One, maybe two bridesmaids.
Flowers from Trader Joe’s and minimal centerpieces.
Please don’t think though that I didn’t enjoy our wedding! I did, but for me, the most important part of the day was marrying my best friend and the rest of it was just noise that if I’m being honest, eclipsed the day for me. I do regret that…but hindsight is 20/20 as they say and I will cherish the day for what it was…the start of my new life with the one person who really understands me and loves me for all my flaws and imperfections. How awesome is that?!
That was a little deep, wasn’t it friends? Might be more of that as I’m embracing my writing this summer and being more honest and raw with my thoughts. This summer has been hard for me. I’ve spent a lot of it alone, something I’ll be writing about in the next few weeks. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but it’s presented a lot of quiet time for me to really think and dissect things. Not all pretty, but that’s ok. Life isn’t always the highlight reel we see online :)
I hope this August is everything you want it to be. I hope you get to do those summer things that are on your list like hitting up the beach, picking strawberries, drinking cold beer on a hot day, hotdogs at the ballpark, fresh fruit from the farmstead, fresh flowers in your house, sandals and sundresses, minimal makeup, ice cream and holding hands with a loved one listening to your favorite tunes.
See you next time!
Jenn xoxo
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